Should you regularly log into your online dating account?

In this post, we explain why you should regularly log into your online dating account.

When search results are shown, most dating sites will show the date of last activity/login for each profile.

In order to keep this as recent as possible, we do advise that you should log into your online dating account on a regular basis.

This will also help your online dating experience in the following ways (by regular we mean at a minimum once every two days):

1. Other members know you’re interested in dating

Imagine you saw two almost identical profiles, one of them had been on the site in less than 48 hours the other is over hasn’t been on the site for over 3 months.

Which one do you think you would more likely send a message to? Yes, exactly the one who had been active within 48 hours as you can see there is more chance of them seeing your message and responding.

2. Search results

Search results are often displayed to members in the order of last activity. So the more recent it is that you have logged on the better your chance of getting to the top of the search results. You want to be at the top as they may never get down to page 5!

In order to show activity, you don’t have to even do anything on the site all you need to make sure is that you have logged into the member’s area.

So there you go, log on regularly to see some great benefits.

 

When you next log on, you might want to consider a spring clean, why not take a look at the following two blog posts to see if its needed?

A post on what makes a good profile photo

A post on if you should update your online dating profile

 

Should you update your profile?

Should you update your profile?, online profile, online dating, singles
Heart made from stones

You have been on a dating site for some time and your wondering, should you update your profile?  In this blog post, we answer why we think you should!

We believe you should update your profile on a fairly regular basis, say bi-weekly or monthly. The reason is that your profile should be a statement about you and your life and that is never written in stone, is it?

If possible not only should you change the written content you should also consider changing your photos, there are a few reasons why this might work to your advantage:

1. It keeps your content fresh

There will be single people who read your profile one day and think, umm they sound nice but I’m not quite sure. Take our word for it, they will come back to your profile and they will read it again!

Wouldn’t it be great if when they read it again they see something new and exciting in there? If you have updated your profile before they go back again they might just find something in that new content that means they want to contact you.

Something new might be just the deal clincher they were looking for. So go on, keep it fresh and keep it up to date.

2. It might put you at the top of the search results

By keeping your profile up to date it might put your profile at the top of the search results. When a dating site returns profiles from a members search, they have to decide how to present those search results.

This can be done by “last activity” (i.e the last time that someone logged onto their profile), it can also be done by “proximity” (i.e the distance they live from you) but what if you are still equal with someone?

They may well base it on when the profile was last updated. So keeping your profile up to date might also rank your profile higher in search results, which for obvious reasons is a good thing!

3. It might mean you make it onto daily emails

All dating sites usually send out a dating email that draws attention to profiles that the recipient of that mail might be interested in. Dating sites will send out a number of emails to members.

But there are a couple which might include your profile if you have updated it. One is an email that says “have you considered contacting these members?” and when they select these profiles it will be based on whether you “fit” the requirements but then it could be down to whether you have an up to date profile (as mentioned above).

Other emails show members who “have just added more photos”, this means you might appear on those emails if you have swapped/added photos. Lastly, we have seen some that show members who have simply “updated their profile”, which is what we are talking about in this post.

In order to remind yourself to update your profile, why don’t you set up calendar alerts

 

While you are thinking about updating your profile.  Why not think about updating your photos?  We have a great  post on the best profile photos, you can read it HERE.

Updating your profile might get you a date, so why not check out our post on First and Second date ideas.

 

What is the online dating protector?

What is the online dating protector
What is the online dating protector

I have seen a reference to online dating protector (ODP) on tallsingles.co.uk, but I have no idea what it is?  This article will explain all!

So what is the online dating protector?

Our site is part of the “Global Personals” brand, worldwide leading experts when it comes to internet dating.

They were aware that people could be using internet dating for all the wrong reasons so they set up the online dating protector (ODP). The ODP is a UK based team of 55 highly trained online dating safety experts, whose main objective is to keep you safe on our site and here is how they go about doing just that.

With over 1.5 million members on the site, it can be very difficult to make sure everyone is acting within the guidelines, we do also ask that members are vigilant and report anything they see that does feel right.

Here is a little bit about what ODP do and how you can really help.

Report profile.

On TallSingles.co.uk every profile has a “report profile” button. Should you see issues with the profile you should hit that button to report it. Once it has been reported the team at ODP will be alerted and they will then look into the issue.

The issue will be looked into within the hour. Any reports made are done so anonymously, so don’t be afraid to report something.

Live Chat

When you report a profile you will be given the option to chat with one of our experts. That way we can get to a resolution quickly. If we are in agreement and the other person has acted wrongly we will remove their profile.

Round the clock monitoring

Our team work 24 hours a day, 7 days a week to keep you safe online. Every photo and profile that is uploaded to the site is reviewed. The ODP team are trained to look out for common scammer signs so they can act on it quickly.

Anti-scam software

The team at ODP use custom built and very intelligent software to scan the site and give a risk rating to every single member. Those with a high-risk rating are constantly monitored and will be removed if they are not following the guidelines

Genuine members

The ODP’s main aim is to ensure that only genuine members remain on our site. That is why they use a variety of techniques to identify any members who may not be who they say they are. Alongside the profile reports and the anti-scam software, they will also cross-check members profiles to Facebook and google images.

Their aim quite simply is to allow us to run a dating site which has genuine members and one that is safe to use day in day out.

 

Why not join our tall community?

So why not join our excellent Facebook group called “What’s the weather like up there” (We hope you like the name as much as us!), it’s great to share tall stories like this one, or tall humour, jokes, basically anything tall-related. You can join by clicking HERE.

 

Compare eHarmony to Tallsingles

Compare eHarmony to Tallsingles
Compare eHarmony to Tallsingles

In this post, we compare eHarmony to Tallsingles, so that you can make the best decision when it comes to which one to join.

A bit about eHarmony

eHarmony advertises claims to use scientific matching to match you to members. So how does that work? Well, when you sign up, you have to answer a number of questions, we think there must be about 100.

Most of the questions take the form of, does this word “happy” relate to you? Then your answer has to be on a sliding scale, from “not at all” to “somewhat” to “yes, very”.

It’s also a clever system as initially, I tried to rush through it and it spotted the inconsistency in my answers and removed me from the process of logging in.

Once you have completed that process the site then finds matches for you, in fact, there is no search facility on the site. Those matches are meant to be scientifically the most matched people to your profile.

So what are the key differences when you compare EHarmony to Tallsingles?

1. Setting up your profile

On eHarmony the initial login process sets up most of your profile (but it does take 25 to 30 minutes). Once your basic profile is complete you can add more written detail such as your likes, a little about you and who you want to find.

On Tallsingles.co.uk, you can actually skip most of the initial questions (not that we recommend it) and get into the main site in about 5 minutes. Once you are through that stage, you can then take a look around and go back and complete your full profile (which you must do!).

2. Can you run your own searches for potential dates?

On eHarmony you cannot run searches for potential matches, the site picks the matches for you. On TallSingles.co.uk you can run as many searches you like, selecting and de-selecting criteria and even change the location.

3. What are the membership levels and what features do they give you?

On eHarmony there are three levels of membership, free, basic and total connect. Total connect is almost exactly the same price as basic and therefore you would never take that option since total connect has more features than basic.

So with free membership, you can view your match’s profiles (but importantly not their photos) and you can access the “book of you”. Based on the answers you have provided this gives you a book which gives you insights about yourself and your personality.

With an upgrade to Total connect you get to see your matches photos, see who has viewed you, send and receive unlimited messages, talk on the phone safely with secure call and get a deeper personality profile with premium “book of you”.

The free subscription on Tallsingles.co.uk, allows you to search members profiles (getting access to their entire profile including photos), complete your profile and receive messages.

The paid subscription on Tallsingles.co.uk allows you to:

  • Read and send messages
  • Put yourself in the Spotlight
  • Send gifts to members you like
  • Chat online with members
  • Subscribe to mobile alerts
  • Write your own dating diary

4. Cost

So a key consideration is and should be cost.

So how much does eHarmony cost? Well like most dating sites they don’t publish that on their site, I have registered for free and clicked for an upgrade. As said above the basic and the “total connect” memberships are the same cost, so for purposes of this

As said above the basic and the “total connect” memberships are the same cost, so for purposes of this comparison, I am going to compare against the cost of the “total connect” package.

The price I was quoted for the “total connect” package was as follows:

12 month membership – £12.95 per month (£155.40 for the period)
6 month membership – £27.95 per month (£167.70 for the period)
3 month membership – £37.95 per month (£113.85 for the period)

On the other hand TallSingles.co.uk costs:

6 month’s membership – £13.33 per month (£79.95 for the period)
3 month’s membership – £16.66 per month (£49.95 for the period)
1 month membership – £24.95

5. Number of members

Tallsingles.co.uk has 1.5 million members so we are confident there will be someone in your area. We found that there were much fewer matches on eHarmony. But we suggest you join both for free to make that comparison yourself.

 

So that’s how we compare EHarmony to Tallsingles, but what do you think of them?  Have you tried either of them?  If you have a view on one of them, or you think there is something that we haven’t covered, why not leave a comment below.

 

We have some other comparisons that you might want to read too:

Compare Match.com to Tallsingles

Compare Tinder to Tallsingles

Compare 6FootLover to Tallsingles

 

Join our tall community

So why not join our excellent Facebook group called “What’s the weather like up there” (We hope you like the name as much as us!), it’s great to share tall stories like this one, or tall humour, jokes, basically anything tall-related. You can join by clicking HERE.

 

Compare Tinder to Tallsingles.co.uk

Compare Tinder to Tallsingles
Compare Tinder to Tallsingles

In this blog post, we compare Tinder to Tallsingles.co.uk to give you an honest and unbiased comparison.

Tinder is an application (app) that you download onto your smartphone. It is one of the newest dating ideas and exploded onto the scene when it was introduced.

It started as a hookup/casual sex app but is now being used by most people looking for anything from a serious relationship to casual sex. You must have a Facebook profile in order to use Tinder.

In an effort to help matches get to know each other better, Tinder has introduced ‘Moments.’ The idea is that you take a photo using the app which is then sent to all your matches, they then view your moment and can swipe left for ‘nope’ or right to ‘like’, just like with profiles.

You’ll then be able to see who liked your ‘moment’ and can start chatting with them based on this extra information. It’s a bit like Snapchat in that the photos will expire after 24-hours, and like Instagram because you can doodle on your photos and add pretty filters.

So that’s a bit about Tinder, now let’s compare both under 4 different categories.

1. Profile

Tinder uploads your profile for you by pulling the details from your Facebook page. Your profile will be made up of your first name, age, photos (your choice from your Facebook profile) and the pages you have ‘liked’ on Facebook.

TallSingles.co.uk, uses the more familiar dating profile approach, split into two parts. The first part is a multiple choice section where you choose your hobbies, select your eye colour etc. and the second is free format, where you write about yourself and what you are looking for in a potential date.

So which is best, well each has their pros and cons. The tinder profile is certainly easy to set up, as long as your Facebook profile is up to date. You will need to make sure your Facebook profile contains some decent photos and you have ‘liked’ pages that represent your interests.

On the other hand on the TallSingles.co.uk profile, you write it and create it separately from your Facebook account. It might take slightly longer to complete but it will give potential matches many more details about you.

2. Searches

Tinder has again simplified the search option. Tinder finds potential matches near you based on your GPS location (you can narrow it down by searching by age and distance) and if they take your fancy, you swipe right to ‘like’ them. If not, go left to ‘pass’. If they’ve also ‘liked’ you – bingo. It’s a match and you can start messaging.

On TallSingles.co.uk, you would either wink or message someone you liked. A ‘wink’ is almost the Tinder equivalent of their ‘like’, as it’s quick and simple and you don’t even need to write anything. A message, on the other hand, gives you the opportunity to be able to write something to the member and explain why you are contacting them.

There are pro’s and cons of each approach, one is fast and convenient the other requires more thought but may get better results.

3. Tall Matches

One significant downside for tall people on Tinder is that you cannot filter by height on tinder when searching. Not only that but you do not even know their height at first as it’s not shown on their profile.

Of course on TallSingles, all our members are “tall” by definition and their height is displayed on their profile.

4. Cost

TallSingles is free to join, so you can take a look around the site and see if it is for you. But as we have mentioned before you have to pay a membership fee in order to join. The costs are as follows:

6 month’s membership – £79.95 (£13.33 per month)
3 month’s membership – £49.95 (£16.66 per month)
1 month membership – £24.95

Tinder, on the other hand, is free to download and add your profile. Until recently it was completely free but they have now introduced a fee. The fee kicks in when once you have reached 100 ‘likes’ in a day.

Like most other dating sites they have not been transparent about their costs. But a recent Dailymail article suggested they were charging different fees to different people. It found that people were being charged anywhere from £1.49 to £14.99 a month.

5. Paid for services

If you pay for membership on tallsingles.co.uk you can:

  • Read and send messages
  • Put yourself in the Spotlight
  • Send gifts to members you like
  • Chat online with members
  • Subscribe to mobile alerts
  • Write your own dating diary

If you pay for Tinder, you get Tinder Plus, which allows you to:

  • Unwind your last decision
  • Change your location
  • Turn off ads.

Conclusion

When you compare Tinder to Tallsingles, there are certainly some differences.  You will ultimately need to decide which is best for you.  But don’t forget you can always join both for free and see which you like best after a couple of weeks.

 

We have done some other comparisons which you can read about here:

Comparing Match.com to tallsingles.co.uk

Compare 6FootLover.co.uk to tallsingles.co.uk

Compare plentyoffish.com to tallsingles.co.uk

Join our tall community

So why not join our excellent Facebook group called “What’s the weather like up there” (We hope you like the name as much as us!), it’s great to share tall stories like this one, or tall humour, jokes, basically anything tall-related. You can join by clicking HERE.

 

Write that first message and make sure it gets a reply

write that first message, online dating, singles
Computer, pad and pen on a desk

In this article, we are going to tell you how to write that first message and make sure you get a reply.

So you have a great main profile picture as you followed our advice (if you haven’t read that post click HERE) and you have a killer profile (read our blog post HERE) so now you want to write that first message.

So here is a great way to write it.

1. Leave the subject line until last

You want the subject to match the content and you don’t know what the content is yet so plan the content first.

2. Remember they can read your profile so don’t repeat it in your message.

A common mistake people make is they rewrite their profile in their message and that makes your email worthless!

You see when someone sees you have messaged them, they are either going to read it first and then check out your profile, or read your profile and then the message. Some obviously might not go to your profile at all but that in our experience is pretty rare.

So repeating what is already in your profile just makes your message boring and that’s definitely what you want to avoid in your message.

3. Draft it on word

Draft the message on Microsoft Word or some other word processor, run a spelling and grammar check and then copy and paste it into the message.

You can also download a really great spelling and grammar checker called Grammarly which will check your message for errors as you write it.  Best of all it’s FREE!

Bad spelling and grammar is a complete turn off!

4. Start with Hi, Hello or Hey

Start with one of these simple words.

5. The first sentence – when you write that first message avoid common beginnings

Avoid common starting sentences, such as:

  • I’m new to this and don’t know what to put
  • I saw your profile and just had to send a message (well obviously that’s why you are messaging)
  • I have been trying to come up with this message for ages.

These are all common beginnings, you need to stand out, grab attention and be different.

6. The first sentence – show you read their email.

We believe you need to show in your first email that you read their profile as if you can show that, you have shown you have taken the time to do so. Taking that time shows you are serious and that’s a great way to start!

So if you haven’t read their profile go and read it again. When reading it, make a couple of notes on anything they seem really passionate about. Do they pick out anything that they really enjoy doing, a past time? a hobby? Do they mention a specific place they really enjoy visiting? Have they had any fantastic experiences in the past that they are sharing on their profile?

Have they asked a question in their profile that you could answer in your email or an open-ended sentence? For example, they might have ended with “just send me a message” and you start your email with “I’d like to know you, so here’s your message”.

7. Avoid common content to stand out.

So as we always say you need to stand out, so here is a list of really common things people talk about, so you can avoid it:

  • Everyone talks about travel – Whether it’s “I have always wanted to go to….”, “I have travelled…”, “I loved my gap year when I went to…”, so leave the travel talk to message 2 or 3.
  • Rain, everyone seems to love it… they love to put “love watching rain…”, “love the clear air after it has rained…”, “love being out in the rain..”, It’s honestly amazing the number of times we see this.
  • People love talking about themselves, again the number of times people put… “I’m 32, single, have a steady job but something is missing”… well of course that’s the case it’s why you’re on the site in the first place!
  • I love having a laugh and I love being funny – Yes, of course, you do, everyone does don’t them? Again everyone puts that, but of course, it is a given right? Everyone wants to be with someone who makes them happy and laugh!

8. Do mention why YOU are interested in them

Something made you want to email them, just think about that, something made you want to email them out of all the people on the site, you chose them. So spell out what it was.

Was it the fantastic smile in their photo? Their beautiful long brunette hair? Was it the fact they were a gym freak? Or the fact they seemed to have a bubbly personality.

Spell it out to them, as you want them to know what you think is important to you about them. Plus pointing out nice things is flattering and everyone loves that!

9. Put a joke in there

Why not add a little joke, but make it easy to read if that makes sense and as subtle as possible. A great one I read once, was a guy who had no hair, put in his message “Fancy a walk along the seafront, I love the feeling of wind through my hair!”

Or you could put in your best funny joke.

10. End with a question.

End your message with a question so they have something to reply to. But again make it original and in keeping with the theme of the message. Again avoid the travelling questions!

 

So there you have it, that is how you write that first message! Do you have any other techniques you use to write that first message?  If so we would love to hear them, why not drop a comment in the box below?

 

9 ways to get extra legroom seats on a plane

extra legroom seats on a plane, View from a plane, plane, sky, wings
View from a plane

In this article, we look at ways to get extra legroom seats on a plane. After all for us tall people, sitting in “normal” seats is both:

After all for us tall people, sitting in “normal” seats is both:

a) painful and

b) can increase the risk of DVT

Long-haul Flights (possibly where there is most need to get extra legroom seats on a plane)

1. Book business/first class

Yes, it’s expensive but perhaps once in your life, you should go and splash out. Book a premium seat, enjoy the journey and stretch out in comfort!

2. Go for the upgrade

You could try and get an upgrade when you get to the airport.  Here are our top tips to give you the best chance to get that upgrade:

2.1. Dress smart – I have been told that in first class they don’t like holey jeans, so look the part.

2.2. Arrive early – Let them know you’re happy to move to first class if the flight is full.  Then keep your fingers crossed!

2.3. Ask politely – Why not ask for that upgrade?  The worst they can do is say no!

2.4. Be loyal – Join the airline’s frequent flyer programme and use their airline as much as possible.

2.5. Check your emails on the run-up to the flight – you might be offered an upgrade at a reduced price.

2.6. Get mad if there is a problem – they might upgrade you to calm you down, but not so mad that the police are called.

3. Build up air miles during the year and use them to upgrade.

There are plenty of ways to build up air miles during the year, from using special credit cards, to swapping Tesco Clubcard points.  Then use them to upgrade your flight.

We highly recommend a website which discusses getting air miles in so much more detail than we are here.  Sign up to their newsletter we promise you will not be disappointed.  The website is called Head for points.

4. Check in online EARLY.

If possible check in online the day and hour check-in opens, that way you have the best chance to get the best legroom seats.  Firstly go for emergency exit seats, if they are gone then visit seat guru to find the next best!

5. Ask at the check-in desk

If you haven’t already reserved them before you go to the airport, still ask at checkout.  There is a chance they may still be able to move you into a better seat.

6. Pay the extra charge when booking to reserve them.

Most airlines now, even budget ones give you the option to pay extra to reserve the emergency exit seats.  It’s a guaranteed way to make sure you get the extra legroom you need.

7. Ask someone in a good legroom seat polity if they will swap.

If you see someone shorter in an extra legroom seat, you could ask them to move.  I have done it a couple of times and it has worked.  I was very grateful and purchased a drink for them from the bar.

8. Tell the cabin crew you can’t brace in an emergency

You could tell the cabin crew that you can’t get into the emergency brace position.  I know for example there is no chance that I could get my head in between my legs on a “normal” airline seat.

The only option to fix this is to move you to a seat where you can, one with longer legroom.  However, there is a chance they could remove you from the flight saying that you cannot act appropriately in the event of an emergency and that puts the airline at risk.

I have personally never used this one, but I have heard people say it does work.

Short-haul Flights

1. Book them if you can

Some short-haul and budget airlines let you book a speedy boarding (which gets you on the plane first to be able to bag those seats) or actually book the required seat.  So check the options for the airline when making the initial booking.

2. Use all of the long-haul methods.

 

So that’s what we recommend, have we missed any other ways?  If we have please let us know them by leaving a comment below.

 

Why not discuss this type of issue in our tall community Facebook group called “What’s the weather like up there” (We hope you like the name as much as us!), it’s great to share tall stories like this one, or tall humour, jokes, basically anything tall-related. You can join by clicking HERE.

 

Why not take a look at some of our other tall related blog posts:

The 32 absolute worst parts about being tall

So how do you respond to common height questions?

 

Don’t make these 5 internet dating mistakes?

don't make these 5 internet dating mistakes, Couple in the sunset, online dating, dating, couple
Couple in the sunset

Make sure you don’t make these 5 internet dating mistakes

Here are our top 5 internet dating mistakes that we see single people regularly make and that we want you to STOP making them right now!

1. Not uploading a profile photo

Now let me ask you a simple question. Would you go to a bar and chat to someone who was wearing a balaclava. The answer (unless you’re into that sort of thing) must be NO.Why? Well because the person has hidden their identity and you don’t really know who they are. They could the nicest person underneath, but they are hiding that from you.

Why? Well because the person has hidden their identity and you don’t really know who they are. They could the nicest person underneath, but they are hiding that from you.

It’s no different on internet dating sites. Without a profile picture, you look like you are hiding something and hiding something in a relationship is never a good way to start!

Plus remember your profile is the first thing someone looking for you online sees, it appears in search results and next to any messages you send! So it’s vital you get it right! Here is our handy free guide to getting the right profile picture

Check out two great articles we have on this:

What makes a good profile photo?

What additional photos should you upload in your profile?

2. Not taking time over your profile

Many people speed through their profile or don’t even complete it! The profile section is used to identify you in search results and is also one of the first things someone will read when they decide if they want to make contact.

Not taking time to complete this section really shows that you haven’t made the effort and that’s not going to go down well. The profile splits into two sections let’s take a quick look at both.

Multiple choice

There is a section for multiple choice, this helps the search function on the site pick out the most relevant people for someone’s search query.

Let’s take the following as an example. Let’s say you like “skiing” so in the hobbies section you click “skiing”. Now if someone is searching for people who like “skiing” as their interest as they really enjoy the same hobby, your profile has a good chance of being on their results list.

So only tick things that are relevant to you and that are true.

Free format

There is also a section where you can write something about yourself and about who you would like to meet.Now, this is where you really need to get your personality across to the person reading your profile. So make it fun, entertaining and interesting. You want someone to read it and think “Wow I really want to know more about this person”

Now, this is where you really need to get your personality across to the person reading your profile. So make it fun, entertaining and interesting. You want someone to read it and think “Wow I really want to know more about this person”

Also, try to pop in a couple of points here that someone could pick up on in an initial email. For example, you could put something like “I have a dream to drive across the USA”, or “I plan to run the London Marathon” etc.

We have a great post on writing your profile:

Want to know how to write the perfect profile message?

 

3. Writing very long messages

Don’t write really long messages, it shows that you have too much time on your hands and it can make the process of dating online really dull. That’s not to say that you shouldn’t answer their questions or ask your own in your reply, just don’t go on and on.

Getting the message length right is key, also key to the messages is learning from the next mistake.

Why not check out our post:

Write an attention-grabbing headline for your online dating message

4. Waiting too long to meet up

It’s not until you meet up with someone that you know if you really like them and if there is that magical spark! Everyone can sound good over a few messages, but what are they like to hold a conversation with?

There is no point spending 3 months emailing one another every day, only to find out that when you meet up there is no attraction. So keep it to a couple of messages and then be bold and suggest you meet up, yes you heard me you can be the one to make the move and yes that applies to women as well as men.

If it doesn’t go that well then put it down to a great experience and start finding someone new online. If it does work out, then fantastic, here’s to a great relationship.

5. Knowing your limits

Now we all like to think we have the body of David Beckham or the looks of Kelly Brook but in reality, that’s only true for a few of us.You have to approach people online who have the same level of instant visual appeal as you. For example, you are not going to see David Beckham date Sue Boyles, or Kelly Brook date Jeremy Clarkson (ok, I admit it a bit too far, but I hope you get my point).

You have to approach people online who have the same level of instant visual appeal as you. For example, you are not going to see David Beckham date Sue Boyles, or Kelly Brook date Jeremy Clarkson (ok, I admit it a bit too far, but I hope you get my point).

Deep down everyone knows their limits, I think you find them out at school. You know who the really good looking people were and you kind of knew where you fit on the scale. It’s the harsh truth, but it’s how love works. You’re usually not physically attracted to someone if they are in the lower league than you.

What happens when people start internet dating, is they immediately go after the league above. You want to date the best looking man/woman and you think you can just because you are on a dating site, rather than meeting them in person. So you send out 20 emails and you don’t get a reply, you’re disheartened and you leave the site.

But, IT WASN’T THE SITES FAULT, IT WAS YOURS, as you chose wrongly. Had you have gone for your league things could have turned out very differently.

 

So how many of these mistakes have you made?  1, 2? Well, now you can make sure you don’t make these 5 internet dating mistakes.

Did we leave anything off our list?  If we did, please drop them in the comments below.

 

Single men, want to know how to write the perfect profile?

know how to write the perfect profile, Single man looking to the sky, single, dating,
Single man looking to the sky

Single men take note! This article explains everything.  After reading it you will know how to write the perfect profile.

We have taken a look at the profiles of our male members and we are now giving an honest review with examples! Actual extracts from members profiles are in bold italics with square brackets []

Single men, take note of these bad profiles

Single men, take note!  This is what you DON’T want to do!

1. No example, but 90% of the profiles we read had spelling/grammar errors.

So please write your profile in a word document first, run a spelling and grammar check and then copy and paste it into your profile.

2. [Look no further, evenings and weekends need not be boring anymore. Now this is something of a cliché]

Never put the word cliché in your post, that’s a cliché in itself!

3. [I equally happy indoors and outdoors]

Well firstly, this is exactly how it was written. Do you think they read their profile? It’s terrible grammar.

Apart from that the number of times people put they love the outdoors, they love being outside, they love being in the fresh air. Well doesn’t everyone.

It would be better to say what you enjoy doing outdoors, it could be “going on long rambles” or “walking along the seafront”.

4. [Recently travelled the world for a year, Japan, NZ and Canada among the places I went to, would like to meet someone interested in travelling also but not essential.]

So, this is not too bad, but everyone always talks about travelling and visiting places, your profile is not going to stand out if you labour on about this one.

5. [After a couple of years spent working too hard, I’m out to reclaim my personal life, and a lot of folks havesuggested internet dating, so here I am]

This was someone’s entire profile. It’s far too short, contains lots of spelling/grammar errors and doesn’t really say anything.

6. [I enjoy trying to make people laugh I think having a good laugh is important life is too short so you might as well enjoy it]

People always talk about humour and having a laugh, if you want to stand out then avoid mentioning it.

Doesn’t everyone want to be with someone who puts a smile on their face and makes them laugh?

7. [Just looking for Miss Right!]

It’s mentioned so many times in various ways, we also see “Just looking for the one”, “Just looking for my one in a million”, and “they say there is someone out there for everyone”.

Get the picture? Again isn’t everyone on a dating site looking for this? Why state it then?

8. [Never quite sure what to say] or [Hi, never done anything like this before so not too sure what to expect, just looking to meet someone new and see what happens] or [Am I the only one who’s rewritten their ad several hundred times?]

These are all the same theme. Firstly no one ever knows what to say and secondly, everyone says it is new to them.Well isn’t internet dating new to everyone at some point?

Well isn’t internet dating new to everyone at some point? It’s common, won’t make your profile stand out and so don’t put anything like this in your profile.

9. [Hope you enjoy my profile and pictures, but please have at least 1 picture as this is not a blind dating website, and I wish you all well in your search,]

You don’t have to state this on your profile make your decision as to whether you want to reply once you have received the email.

Not replying to someone as they don’t have any photos up is fine, but you don’t need to state that in your profile.

10. [FOR SALE – One knight in slightly rusty armour minus his trusty white steed… Sensible offers considered!]

Just terrible! You’re not up for sale on a dating site, it isn’t remotely funny!

11. [And how about I top it all off with a relaxing scalp and shoulder massage to help you drift off into complete bliss…]

There is no way you should be talking this intimate in your profile. It comes across as if you are very forward and that is not going to work.

 

Single men, take note of these good profiles so you know how to write the perfect profile!

Unfortunately, there were much fewer examples of things that were good, but here are a couple of things we spotted:

1. [I am hoping to meet someone who is prepared to take the time to get to know each other better and see where it leads. At the very least I make great conversation, I am honest, and I have a great sense of humour]

Very heartfelt and very honest. We believe that is one of the most important things when you write your profile. Make it sincere, honest and simple.

2. [If I had to pick three words to describe myself I’d say… funny, generous and caring]

We think it is a great idea to pick 3 things that describe yourself. In our example, this is all they mentioned on it, but you could add a couple of sentences to explain why that is.

#3. [If I were to describe myself in one sentence – a gent who will open the door for you and offer you my coat when you’re cold]

Surely every woman would love a man like that!

So there you have it.  After reading this you should know how to write the perfect profile.

 

So is your profile picture ok, read our three-part series to make sure it is!

Part I: What makes a bad profile photo? 

Part II: What makes a good profile photo?

Part III: What additional photo’s should you upload to your profile?

 

If you’re at the stage of writing messages, you could also take a look at:

Write an attention-grabbing headline for your online dating message

 

Write an attention-grabbing headline for your online dating message

attention-grabbing headline, Stack of newspapers, headlines, print
Stack of newspapers

In this article, we explain ways that you can write an attention-grabbing headline for your online dating messages!

After all, if they don’t open and read your message, there is no way you’re going to get to go on a date with them!

Think about it what’s the first thing a potential date will see about you on a dating site?

As I have mentioned on here on more than one occasion the first thing a member will see of you on an online dating site will be either:

A. Your profile photo – if they are running a search.

B. Your profile photo and the subject line of your message – if you have messaged them.

So your photo and the subject line of your message carry a lot of weight when you are trying to find someone to date.

We have already covered setting up your photo, you can refer to these previous posts for that:

1. What makes a bad profile photo?

2. What makes a good profile photo?

3. What additional photos should you upload to your profile? 

But now we need to write attention-grabbing headlines for online dating messages so that they get opened and read!  So here are our tips!

1. Subject lines to avoid

You need to avoid going for the common subject lines as they just will not stand out in the message list in someone’s inbox.

Here are a few examples:

A. Well, I didn’t know what to put! (Far too common!)
B. Hey…. (anything starting Hey, Hi, How ya going, How ya doing…. Are terrible!)
C. What’s up (just terrible!)
D. saw your message on here and I just had to message you (again terrible!)
E. I’m the one you have been looking for (don’t ever come across overconfident)
F. You are who I have been looking for all my life (don’t use the life has dealt me a bad card line)

2. Write the message first.

As mentioned in our post about writing messages we suggest that you may want to write the message first so that your subject goes with your message.

3. Try to use something from their profile.

As mentioned when we discussed writing the initial message if you can drop hints in the subject that you have read their profile it will increase the chances of your message being read.

Let’s say they talk about being movie mad in their profile. You drop a few hints that you like movies in your message and your subject line could be “let’s film a hopeless romantic film together?”, or “I don’t want you to be the star of Bridget Jones IV”.

Or for example, they may love skiing, so again you spoke about it in your message and then what about the subject being “Should we try a black run together?”, or “Have you skied down a slope hand in hand?”

4. So what if their profile doesn’t give much away? Then what?

We have come up with a few subject lines and first message lines below that should get you started.  Remember we want to write attention-grabbing headlines to get our message read.

A. Attention-grabbing headline: Do not read this!
First line of the message: Unless you’re going to say yes to a date. Oh, dear looks like we need to arrange that now!

B. Attention-grabbing headline: 5 things you didn’t know about me
First line of the message: Well ok I will give you one of them, but the others you will have to get on our first date. [Then go on to tell them one really interesting/different thing about you]

C. Attention-grabbing headline: I can read your mind
First line of the message: You had to click read!

D. Attention-grabbing headline: !NEPO TSUM UOY
First line of the message: [Anything you want it to be]

E. Attention-grabbing headline: Open and you won’t be disappointed
First line of the message: [Anything you want it to be]

F. Attention-grabbing headline: I love this place……
First line of the message: which serves fantastic Italian food in a very rustic atmosphere! Dinner there would be my treat.

G. Attention-grabbing headline: Knock, Knock…. Who’s there?
First line of the message: A Hopeless romantic?

H. Attention-grabbing headline: I want to grab your attention!!!!!!!!!!!!!
First line of the message: Great now that I have it here is a little bit of information about me.

I. Attention-grabbing headline: You will smile when you read this…
First line of the message: As I smiled when I wrote it.

5. Don’t ramble!

Don’t make your first message too long, I would suggest a couple of paragraphs in length. One paragraph to tell them something interesting about yourself and one to tell them why you were interested in their profile.

 

So have you got any great headlines for first messages that you would like to share with us?  Leave them in the comments below.